Tree Hugger

I wish I had a tree.
I'd hug it every day.
I'd climb up to its tippy-top
To see what I could see.

And if I had a little tree,
I'd treat it oh so nice.
I'd make it grow with bullshit
And water it with pee.

And when my tree grew big and tall,
I'd chop that sucker down.
I'd cut it up for fire wood
And burn it leaves and all.